There are a lot of people in my life who tell me life/my life in NYC is unsustainable, that it's too hard, too expensive, not healthy, too stressful, impossible to raise kids. Some or all of those things may be true, true for some people, but NYC is full of people who don't make a lot of money and make their lives here, raise their children, workout and eat healthy and most importantly are fulfilled and happy.
I left NYC in August last year ready to take a break from New York, in the meantime I have lived in a small city in Chile, and Paris. When we returned from Valparaiso in December it felt like heaven. This last week here has been equally, if not more blissful because of the summer weather.
NYC feels like my home, my soul home, the place where everything rings in harmony. It was really important for me to leave when I did, I got to look at my life in NYC and take stock, what made it harder than it needed to be (roommates, subletters, and my car for the most part). I love my apartment so much it was hard to move to the next step and seriously look at buying, still I grew up where people lived in houses and had mortgages, so it felt like renting wasn't smart. I don't need a car here, and I no longer need to share my living space with anyone but my boyfriend, but was it just a honeymoon period, this desire to "come home". Normally I'd give a lot of stock to this possibility, but when I came back in January I went back to work, worked out at my gym, and fell back into what was almost my life before I left.
But how do you grow old with NYC, there are several apartments opening up in my building this month as people "go home" to wherever they moved here from. I know that moving back here probably means moving to brooklyn or queens, even if the upper west side and harlem hold a permanent place in my heart. I know that I will never want to lug a baby stroller up any subway stairs, and I know that eventually NYC weighs down on you. But even if that weight eventually gets too heavy to bare, what if until it does it makes you really really happy, what if nowhere else every feels this much like home? What if you never find friends like Jon or Renee or Rob/Cindy or Chris elsewhere?
1 comment:
We are moving back to NYC after my four year hiatus in August. I totally feel the same way...conflicted about feeling like NYC is my home despite the grit and constant bombardment of stimuli. Being away has made me realize though, that NYC is not all that terrible...nobody I know there is all that wealthy, yet they're making it work, having kids, being healthy, just like you said. Anyway, this post really struck me...thanks.
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