Smithies in Paris

The other night there was a Smith General Assembly meeting. Smith being my alma mater and wanting to find an American community for myself here I attended. I was under the assumption that the Smith College of Paris would be largely comprised of women much older than myself, I don't see a lot of my contemporaries being involved in Smith activities post graduation. Moreover, it's been a while since going on JYA to Paris meant finding a French boyfriend and marrying him. We just don't marry that young anymore, and the French don't marry in general.

The meeting was at L's house, she was a woman with the kind of apartment you see in Interior Design Magazines she was older and prone to senior moments but she looked great, snappy french bob dyed a nice auburn. I felt like snapping photos and bringing them home to show Sylvain. The agenda for the meeting was a review of the lack of anything happening with the Smith Club in the last few years and then "vote" for new board members. I was a lot confused about the structure of voting- people that wanted to be president, secretary and treasurer stood up and said three sentences about themselves- there were about 8 people, and then the current president sort of said, ok L your president, M your treasurer everyone ok with that? It seemed to have been the type of friendly thing that everyone was just ok with because they've been involved in the club for 40 years and no one was about to say anything against anyone anyway, the only reservation I had was that some younger members were interested in participating and this being the first time the club had had a general assembly meeting in 3 or 4 years we were not able to participate in any significant way. Granted most of the 20 somethings in Paris were former JYA students who came back for more but would likely only stay a year or so, but there were 2 of us who were perhaps here indefinitely because of French companions but there was a glaring rift between the old guard and the new. As far as I could tell there were no members in their 30's and the largest majority of members were in their 50-70's and retired. We were all connected by facebook type social networking sites and the others while they participated in email were unlikely to be setting up profiles and uploading recent photos from a weekend away in Amsterdam.

Afterwards we enjoyed champagne and delicious snacks- even a pecan pie. People exchanged cards and email addresses and with all the networking it seemed like we'd see everyone in a couple weeks or so, but of course nothing could be further from the truth, Smith events don't happen more than a few times a year. I came home around 11 having had a wonderful evening and optimistic about finding at least some sort of American network while I'm here. The truth is, I hated Smith while I was there, it was empowering in finding strength as a woman, I found take back the night vigils moving and when you're in a room without men you see women are natural leaders- at wed's meeting woman stood up and voiced disagreement in confident and ballsy ways concerning anything from dues, being cut off while speaking and generally voicing discontent. It's much more common to see women speak up for themselves when it's an all Smith gathering then when it's not. The name Smith has gotten me jobs and helped me in my career, but while I was there I felt cut off from the world, disappointed with much of what I felt was antiquated and unnatural. We were asked to help recruit or interview potential new Smithies, but I felt like in many ways I wouldn't be a great candidate, after all I was more or less unhappy there and I would have a hard time suggesting anyone else go and have a similar experience. Our current president Carrol Christ has been found to be the subject of blanket disapproval from current students, and professors alike. Smith from what I hear is in a state of disrepair losing students, professors, popularity and faculty positions. In this day and age many have never even heard of women's college's and except for lesbians it doesn't offer the social experience like their co-ed counterparts can. Underage drinking, drug use and sex are as prolific as at most other universities, but it all feels like it's taking place at a sequestered insane asylum instead of a house party off campus. Smith straight social life to me has always felt desperate. Maybe things have changed, maybe it was just my experience, but the place was weird. So no matter how good I feel about finding some Smithies in Paris, and appreciative of the jobs the name Smith has helped me get, I just don't feel comfortable sharing my experience with perspective candidates.